1. Big in Sex And The City
In case you're hazy on the whole 'standing you up on your wedding day and publicly humiliating you' thing; it's a deal breaker, FYI. Especially if his reason is that 'he didn't want to walk up the aisle in front of all those people'. What a fass. It's not as if, in the film, he didn't have, like, months and months to say to Carrie 'I'm not sure about this massive wedding actually'. Oh, but he didn't want to spoil her fun planning the big day, so he waited until she was at the altar and jilted her instead. Nice.
2. Michael Carrington in Grease 2
How creepy is this guy? He stalks Stephanie for months, finds out what she's into and then becomes all those things. Shudder. It's like, 'Hey, I wanted to know what kind of stuff you like so I went through your bins and saw that there were some pizza boxes in there so I've bought us some flights to Rome and I've changed my name by deed poll to Gianni da Vinci. Will you go out with me?'
3. Adrian Grenier's whiny, passive aggressive character in The Devil Wears Prada
Andy (Anne Hathaway), an aspiring writer, gets a shitty, entry level job at the biggest women's fashion magazine in the world. Her boyfriend, Nate, instead of being happy for her; instead of saying 'sure, your long hours suck but just get your head down, do it for a year by which time you'll have enough experience to leave and get a less shitty position on a proper newspaper'; instead of supporting her when she's so obviously being bullied by her boss, sulks passive aggressively throughout the movie, making digs about her clothes and appearance, and stone walling her.
The more glamorous she becomes, the more he dislikes her job because it means she's no longer the dowdy, geeky girl who's grateful to be going out with him. Jealous, spiteful, manipulative, yet he's considered her reward at the end of the film for doing what he wants by jacking in her passport to her career.
Luckily because it's the movies, she still manages to get the dream job at the end, but the dream man? Nope.
4. Nick Curran in Basic Instinct
In every sex scene, the time between first kiss to ejaculation is, on average, about 2 minutes. And Sharon Stone's character STILL falls in love with him? I guess psychopathic murdering women love premature ejaculators. The rest of us? Not so much.
5. Edward Cullen in Twilight
If you woke up in the middle of the night to find your boyfriend sitting in the corner of your bedroom watching you sleep, would you:
A. find it romantic?
B: shit yourself and apply for a restraining order?
The correct answer is B, by the way.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
I have been in love with Michael Carrington since I was a child... thank you for including him in your shit boyfriend list... yes, he would make a shitty boyfriend but he is so pretty!
True *sigh*.
But, important life lesson to remember: Pretty does not necessarily = non stalk-y!
Sidenote: Anyone else prefer him when he was the hot nerd? He was much less camp when he was unpopular.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! My boyfriend compares himself to the 'desirable' love interests on tv and this proves I'm telling the truth when I say, "Dating them in real life would be horrible!"
www.marleeindebt.blogspot.com
Post a Comment